Sunday, June 17, 2012

Father's Day

Happy Father's Day, Daddy. We miss you.

This is my third Father's Day since my dad passed away.

I never know what to do with myself on Father's Day. I walk around afraid that someone is going to ask me if I "took care of my dad for Father's Day". I fear that I might start to cry. And never stop.

I only describe myself as "the son my father never had' (I am the oldest of three daughters). I learned the game of football so that I could spend time with my dad and speak his language.

The first NFL season opener after he died found me inconsolable. Three years later, I still reach for the phone when I'm watching a football or basketball game and need to gloat or commiserate.

Burying my daddy was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I tried to do right by him and my family when all that I wanted was to curl up in a ball and cry.

You know, it's funny that I always expected the "head of  the family" to step in and handle matters. Imagine my shock when I discover that mythical guy was ME!

I love you Daddy.

1 comment:

  1. I was scrolling down you blog and came across this post.
    So sorry for your loss.
    I lost my dad 2 years ago and it is still hard for me not to pick up the phone to call him to chat about one of our favourite shows.
    I too had to handle all the matters as you. I think it put off my grieving.

    I see that you and I seem to be alike.